Posts Tagged ‘Swimsuit Phobia’

Men Like ‘Em Real Thick & Juicy

July 9, 2008

I spend a lot of time at the beach, bitches.  Throw your Jaywords (Trademark BangieB) at me, but remember this: it also means that I have double, triple, quadruple, whatevertuple the opportunity to feel shitty about the way I look in a swimsuit.  But you know what?  As I was working on the interwebz, drinking Maker’s, and listening to my iPod last night, Buddy Guy told me that’s some bullshit right there.   Sir Mix-A-Lot could take a lesson in subtlety from Mr. Guy, who sweetly crooned to me: 

Look at that, she shakes all over when she walk

She made a blind man see

She made a dumb man talk

What kind of woman is this?

Hmmmm, shucks

I was so inspired I had to dedicate it to my girl Trixie from Toronto, whose little group blog Buttercuppunch just happens to rank 62nd in popularity among WordPress’s 3.5 million blogs today.  So look for Trixie and me and the rest of the cabal on the beach soon.  We’re gonna make a blind man see, make a dumb man talk.  The gates of heaven must be open because we just walked by.