I Always Wanted to Marry Someone Just Like Mom


Today, Clay Aiken finally told us the grass is green and oh, by the way, he’s gay.  LiLo confirmed that she’s loved SamRon for “a very long time.”  I’m sensing a sea change in the freedom gay Americans have to be themselves.  And isn’t that the most basic freedom?  And doesn’t the right to marry their beloveds necessarily follow?  I’m certainly glad that Steven Spielberg, Kate Capshaw, Brad Pitt, and their respective wallets think so.  High five!

According to one of my anonymous tipsters, though, the good news hasn’t reached Fort Smith, Arkansas, where “same-sex marriage” means signing up for a lifetime of living out your incestuous fantasies.  Say what???  Read on:


I am all for same sex marriages. My wife wants me to be the same sex as her father and my father. I want her to be the same sex as my mother and her mother. This philosophy has served us pretty well for almost 40 years. Sorry, that’s not the kind of same sex marriages the Democratic hypocrites wish to hear about.

Frank Oliver

Fort Smith

*Cut the banjo music.*

5 Responses to “I Always Wanted to Marry Someone Just Like Mom”

  1. dorothyzbornak Says:

    Oh, rednecks. You just can’t make a point without it sounding like an incest situation, can you?

  2. AGreenEyeDevil Says:

    Bless Frank’s red neck heart, did he make it beyond the 3rd grade??

  3. Blondegrlz Says:

    Do you think Frank sleeps in a really big bed or do they all take turns?

  4. M Says:

    is it me or does frank give out a vibe that he likes big gay cock?

  5. BAngieB Says:

    I’m with you Frank, the damn queers need to leave good, God-fearing folks like yourself alone.

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